Auf wiedersehn

             Honestly, I found the blogging, all be it a little annoying, to be helpful. I enjoy going back and reading some of my blog posts. I found myself going deeper with a lot of things I had over looked countless times. I found that my best blogs were on books that I had been reading for years, or on the formatting of the books.

            It was nice that if I wanted to edit a post or add on an idea, I could. There was no hassle. I would just click edit, and be done.  Also, the fact that I could read what I had written, and not have to struggle with my handwriting was nice.

            With spell check and the ability to edit quickly, writing online is very liberating, but I know its very limiting. I hate the Internet when I have to rely on it. Something technical always goes wrong, and you may do the work, but it can be problematic.

            People definitely create online personas that project however they want to come across. I don’t really talk like how I blog, but I want to sound a certain way.  I actually have a few other blogs, not on BlogSpot. I have trouble with themed blogs though. I don’t think I will keep up with this one, but I will keep the posts on file.

            Auf wiedersehn.

Individuality- The Latest Crime

 Stargirl by Jerry Spinelli is a book many of us grew up with.  If you boil it down, the story is about this girl who calls herself Stargirl who is very outlandish and unique. She makes a lot of decisions that most people find peculiar and bizarre.

But I think she made these choices because it’s the way she lived her life. I believe that somewhere along the line of her life her parents or someone else told her “the right thing to do is be nice” or “be who you are”. Those are classic statements that we all get as children. What she wasn’t told, or chose not to comprehend, is that there are rules of society.

She is doing the ultimate of niceness. Unfortunately kindness is a trait that isn’t as understood as it should be. She just didn’t get that enough was enough. However, I think the only reason these kids are so hateful towards her has to do with jealousy, anger, and fright. I think the kids are jealous of her. The other students saw what she had and who she was and wanted to be a part of it. But that can be harder then it looks.

The kids at Mica were angry too. They saw her betray them when she supported the opposing team, and therefore, she made a fool out of them. She represented their school, and the students acted the way she did. They felt personally harmed by her actions even though she was trying to be a good person and make the other team feel just as good as her team.

But, the main reason was fright. They were scared to step out of place, and they were afraid of Stargirl. Stargirl showed them who they wanted to be and, they didn’t want to accept that. They were “perfectly happy the way they were”. They weren’t happy the way they were. They felt free when she had influence over them, but I guess they thought she was getting to high in the status web at school, she was too popular for her own good. So they lost her. And soon lost themselves.

Jackson and the Pips

In Percy Jackson and the Battle of the Labyrinth, I started thinking about why things get so complicated. If you took away all the other character plot lines, this book would be so simple, but because Percy’s actions will affect the other characters, everything is complicated.

In life, you’re always going to have people egging you on or bringing you down. There will always be people to please. You have to figure out who matters, and who doesn’t. Who do you need to please, and who can you ignore? Is anyone important? Is no one important? Who will help you with your goal, and who won't, and does that even matter?

There is this point where Percy seeks the help of a character, that he knows will upset his closest friend, and jeopardize his relationship with her. He still seeks the characters help because he believes that reaching the goal is the most important thing, as much as he loves his friend.

People like to take things personally. The friend that Percy upset thought that Percy had reached out for the other character as an act of defiance to their friendship. I don’t know if she realized it was for the greater good. I don’t know if she cared. I know its sometimes hard for me to believe that what I know is right is what I want.

It comes down to judgment.  You can’t let other people rule who you are and who you want to be in life. You have to be smart enough to figure out who you are and who you want to help shape that.

Little Boys and Disney Channel

I am reading The Invention of Hugo Cabret. In the story, a young boy named Hugo Cabret lives alone in a Paris train station. He has no parental guidance.

Almost everything we know we learn from out parents. We learn what is suppose to be good or bad, smart, silly, a joke, or serious. Hugo was lucky enough to have a parent for the 10 years of his life, but there are a lot of kids who don’t. It’s interesting to think about where these children get their influences for the rest of their lives. Where do they get their values and morals? Somehow, from somewhere, these children do grow up.

I recently have had an eight-year-old move into my house. He is engrossed with every show on Disney Channel. Being someone who use to watch Disney Channel, I couldn’t believe how much I missed as a child. These shows are ridiculous. They show these situations where there will be backstabbing or cheating or something, and then the characters will go around solving the problem in the worst way, and then everything’s fine.

Small children don’t understand that the problems and results they are watching are scripted. Things wouldn’t actually work out the way that it does in the show. I realize I took a lot from those shows, why shouldn’t this eight-year-old?

You see kids growing up in the modern world, and you just see all the influences they take in. Their parents don’t always have control. Hugo may have had a father to teach him, but now he is alone and he has to be smart enough to apply what he knows to his life. 

The Long History of The Catcher in the Rye, It's Relevance, and Annoying Bratty Teenagers.

          The Catcher in the Rye. Oh what a book. Honestly my whole life I thought the book was called Catch Her in the Rye, and even once I learned the real title I thought the book was about some kidnapper who hid in a field of grain. Anyways, I have seen such a mix of emotions to this book. Most of the people I have talked to don't seem to like it very much. Some politely state that they don't enjoy the book (Teddy Ostrow) and some scream in horror, pull a face, and run away (Peter Diller). I have met one person who likes the book, and he said "Every time I read it, I get something different from it".

         Something that I think is extremely interesting is that the story is over 60 years old. I have to ask myself if the book is still relevant to today. Honestly, I think it is. The book was published at a time when kids were suppose to be "seen and not heard". It was ground breaking to have a story about a mid-teenage boy wandering around the city, buying drink, getting hookers, and ridiculing others. 

         I think part of the reason why some many people hate the book, is because the writing is just rambling with long paragraphs and the story doesn't really go anywhere. However I believe that this book is suppose to be the mind of a teenager, something tabooed at that point. Our minds are not interesting, our minds are not formulated, our minds never shut up. Thats what I think the point is. 

        As I said to my dad "I don't like it, but I can relate to it". Hearing a bratty teenager complain page after page, however annoying, was strangely familiar.  

Facing My Fears; The Wisdom of Albus Dumbledore of the Subject of Fate

          I have this problem with going deeper in some of my books. I know exactly why, and I always know when my deepness-block is going to pop up. It happens with books that I grow up with. Percy Jackson, To Kill A Mocking Bird, Moby Dick, This Boys Life, and Harry Potter.
         Now as I was sitting in my backyard the other day, trying to get some inspiration for my essay, I thought of a few lines from the "world wide international best seller!" (that's a bit redundant, no?), and I had an epiphany of sorts. I realized that J.K Rowling was talking about fate in a similar way that I was; Fate is made by your choices, throughout your life (not death).
        "It is our choices that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities."- Albus Dumbledore. In this quote, Dumbledore is saying that the choices you make show the kind of human being you are, not your muscles or wits or whatever. However, on another level, he is saying that your choices will decide what paths you take (who you become), not your abilities (which are pre-existant). 
          "You fail to recognize that it matters not what someone is born, but what they grow to be! "-Albus Dumbledore. In this quote, Dumbledore states that who you were born is not always going to effect the rest of your life, because, as stated before, our choices make us who we really are. On top of that, he is saying that the way you live your life, even if you were born into a certain situation, isn't going to determine your fate.
         If you go through the books, there are countless quotes about what to do, (dragged into an arena to face your death, or walking in with your head held high) and choices to make. Even the houses show this; The houses show you who you are, and whatever house your in effects the way each character plays a role in the story. If you look at how Gryffindors would respond to situations compared to a Hufflepuff, it would be very different.
        Harry Potter is filled with the idea fate, and if you've read the last book, just look at what happens and you'll see what I mean.

Fixing a Well Deserving Blog Post- The Things We Do

          I am still in the wonderful world of Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close, but I don't really want to talk about anything to specific to that book. All you need to know, is that the 9 year old main character, Oskar, travels the city, mainly on foot, to talk to every person with the last name Black. You may think that, logically, he would travel geographically, but he doesn't. He finds these people alphabetically. 

          I always felt so bad for Oskar, having to walk 20 miles because he is too scared to take public transportation. His father was killed in 9/11, and knowing that fact, he is scared of possible targets for terrorists attacks. I had to wonder if Oskar ever wished that he could just teleport there. However, I also think Oskar would say that you need to work for what you want. 

          I always thought, when you wish that you could just get there already or teleport, you do. That is, in a way. Like maybe there are two universes and in one universe things happen when you snap your fingers, but in the other one, the one we live in, we have to do the work. So if you wish you could just be home, the other you is home, but you have to actually do the transportation to get there. 

          Ok, ok that's really strange but think about it. There is this conception of celebrities and other rich people who look like they made millions with no effort. Anyone who seems that they get something without effort, is just that. It seems that way. Most celebrities have to persevere, work hard, and have some sort of talent. 

          The funny thing is, people respect those types of celebrities more then some silly youtube video or Paris Hilton. People respect hard work, and I think that if you didn't have to put any effort into what you accomplished, things would have a lot less value. And if we don't value the things we do, then nothing has any meaning. If nothing has any meaning, whats the point of living?

Original post:

http://thesugarrushblog.blogspot.com/2011/03/work-for-what-you-got-warning-this-post.html

What You Know, It's Unknown

          I've had a rough week. Many things caused that, but one of the reasons for my terrible week, was the last book I read. After countless attempts to handle moving on from Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close, I read petty books all week and now don't have anything I feel is worth a blog, so lets role with this. 
         Something that I've noticed happening a lot in the bloggy-blog world that we live in, is that people really only respond to the blogs on books they know of, or the blogs of people they like. This is something I find mind bottling. People are so resistant of things they don't know. It makes them lazy, scared, confused. I can't even name how many times I've seen people stare in horror at the food in my fridge (I had no idea dumplings were so horrific).
          Being someone who is sort of obsessed with psychology, I had to do a think about why the unknown is so unfathomable (I like that word, don't I?). The thing about explaining the unknown, is that it's very simple. We don't like the unknown because we cannot understand it.
          We, as a race, do not like being ignorant. We don't like to have information withheld from us. We thrive on gossip, on facts, and on language. We need to know whats going on at all times. We feed on knowledge.
          I believe that even the people who say they don't care about education or learning are delusional, because what they are saying is that they don't like to understand. Everyone wants to understand, but sometimes they just can't. The way people deal with that is by being lazy or using fear and confusion to fuel their ignorance.
          Some of the best blogposts I have read, have been on books I had never heard of. I didn't even need a summary because the post it's self was so good. When there is unknown, people jump to conclusions. Good or bad, right and wrong. When looking before you leap isn't an option, don't look. When you've landed, you can make a decision.

Unfathomable- A Nine-Eleven Post

          So after 2+ months, 368 pages, and a bathtub of tears, I finally finished reading Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close. The thing about the ending, is that it isnt such a shocker. It is just a sum of the story. But the characters talk about something constantly: going backwards. 
          Oskar talks of the day his father dies, and how it happened. He talks of everything that happened that could have stopped him from being in the twin towers. He undos everything that has been done. Oskars grandmother talks of everything. This she knows but may not of experienced, being un-done. One thing she says that really stuck out to me is "at the end of my dream, Eve put the apple back on the branch. The tree went back into the ground and became a sapling, which became a seed. God brought together  the land and water, the sky and water, the water and the water, evening and morning, something and nothing. He said Let there be light. And there was darkness". 
        I will be completly honest, tears are streaming down my face as I write this. they are falling onto my key board and my fingers and dancing into the puddles, dragging salty tears across the keys. 
        Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close is about Nine-Eleven. I'm sorry, but unless you are a new yorker, and lived in new york during that time,it doesn't hit you the same. I am not saying that peoples grief is worse or lesser, its just not the same. 
        It is a violation. Theres no other word for it. New York was violated. The US was violated. We were violated. Every word sounds wrong. There is no word, in any language, that anything could utter, that could sum up Nine-Eleven. Everything sound past, and gone. If I had to, I would call it "Backwards Motion". 
        That's the feeling. There is nothing more I wish, at this point, then to go back, and just undo everything. Everything. But I don't think Oskar wants to undo. I mean, he does, but what he really wants is his father back. The way he was. Oskar speaks of how it happened. But ends with his dad in bed with him, telling him the story of the six boroughs, the night before the worst night. That moment should be pure and beautiful. 
       It isn't. Its slandered with knowledge. Knowledge of what will happen the next day. That moment was pure, and it was violated. 
       I want you to know, I am still crying. This book is spectacular, and I do not deserve to try and fathom it in any way. This book has given me the "heaviest boots" I have ever had. Save for my first day of school. The Ninth of September. The worst day. 

Work For What You Got- warning, this post may contain results on nonsense

          I am still in the wonderful world of Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close, but I don't really want to talk about anything to deep in that book. All you need to know, is that the  9 year old main character, Oskar, travels the city, mainly on foot, to talk to every person with the last name Black. You may think that he does it geographically, but he does it alphabetically. 

          I always felt so bad for Oskar, walking 20 miles because he is too scared to take public transportation because his father was killed in 9/11. I had to wonder if Oskar ever wished that he could just teleport there ( he probably has and invented a way to do that). But Oskar would also say that you need to work for what you want. 

          I always thought, when you wish that you could just get there already, or teleport, you do in a way. Like maybe there are two universes and in one universe things happen when you snap your fingers, but in the other one, the one we live in, we have to do the work. So if you wish you could just be home, the other you is home, but you have to actually do the transportation to get there. 

          Ok ok thats really weird but think about it. There is this conception of celebrities and other rich people who look like they made millions with no effort. Anyone who seems that they get something without effort, is just that. It seems that way. Somehow they out effort to it, somehow.

         

He's Just Doing it Because He Can- My Response to Dr. Futterman

           My favorite blog, is Annie Futterman's "Evenings With Dr. Futterman". What I get from the title of her blog, is a therapy session. This is exactly what her blog gives me. Her use of vocabulary is astounding. Her discussion on pop-culture and art and actors blows my mind. Her blog is a therapy session from all the other blog out there. Annie Futterman writes with something I like to call Soul.
          She does not merely read a book and write. She analyzes . She throws her self into the post. The post I wanted to talk about was her post "I Fought the Law and the Law Won", and it is about a book called "A Fraction of the Whole". Annie is very good at reading these captivating books that are far more complex then I could ever have the patients for. However I did give this book a try and really did enjoy the first 5 pages.
         She explores the reason behind getting into trouble. The psychological reasons behind authority and challenging it. However, as always, she spins it by zoning in on this characters specific reasons. This just helps to prove my case that she truly cares for her books, art, and characters.
          She makes this really interesting point, (which is the title of this blog post), about why he breaks the law. I think he finds some solitude in knowing he was better then this seemingly all powerful force (the law). He is basking in the sheer fact that he can.
         Annie has this way of talking about culture as if its the simplest concept, but at the same time, she understands what makes culture, culture. In this post she marks society culture in a dark way. The passion or desire to break it. To punish it.
        That my friends, is what a true blogger should be trying to encase, trying to write about. By choosing these subjects, she sets herself up to have a wonderful blog.

http://eveningswithdrfutterman.blogspot.com/2010/12/i-fought-law-and-law-won.html      

This was About Something Short

Where I am in my book, This Boys Life, there is this long section about this family that Toby meets, and he describes each and every person with deep detail. I wonder, as this is a memoir of his entire life, why was this family so important. And then I got it.

It isn't the how important events are, it's what they mean to you as a person. This family that Toby meets is just something that he must have felt, and stuck to him. Probably the wish that this was his family.

You know what that reminds me of? Dreams. Sometimes I dont remember big ones, but I remember the ones that dont make sense. I guess it's so I can figure them out? Maybe because I wish I could have that dream


Also the family is simple and nice. I also think that Toby just wanted to remember something as simple as a nice family.

Thats what the world needs sometimes, just something sweet and simple. The mind is so complex and fascinating . That has to be a very intersting prosses, when you write a full life memior, and to discover what is important, that you may have forgoten. I wonder how Toby chose what to write about, and I wonder what he left out?

I guess when it comes to showing your memories, its a game of pick and choose, because some fit and others done, and its up to you to dicide what goes where.

Extremely Loud and Incredibly Mind Blowing

          In the book Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close by Jonathan Safran Foer, Oskar, a nine year old child, losses his father in the 9/11 attack. He certainly changes. However his trauma is not what I want to talk about. 
         Filling this book, among the collection of utterly amazing and extremely disturbing photographs, are Oskar's ideas. His theories and inventions. One particular paragraph that I knew I had to write about, was a invention. The paragraph basically goes like this "In bed I invented a drain that would be under everyones pillow, and when people cried it would all go to the same place. That way, in the morning, the weather man could tell if New York was particularly sad that night".
         There is something very comforting about the knowledge that other people, are in the same place as you. The conformation that you are not doing anything out of the ordinary. There is safety in numbers no? And going on a completely emotional and metaphorical sense, that is saying, that the knowledge that you are not alone is what keeps you stable.
         I dont think Oskar feels that he has anyone, and that no one knows him.
         All this kid desires is that knowledge. And it's mind blowing, because the thing is is that there are 100's, THOUSANDS of New Yorkers who knows how he feels. He is currently going through every person in New York with the last name Black. I have a prediction that he will find someone along the way of this hunt, that knows exactly what he is going through, and when he does, he will finally be able to let go. At least understand.
          I cannot wait until I finish this book. Falling apart and coming together. It's most definitely the theme. I just need some proof. For once, this might be fun

I Swear, This is the Fourth Book in a Row I Have Read That is About Mental Challenges and Grammatical Errors That Enhance the Story

          In the book the only alien on the planet by Kristen D. Randle (which by the way, very distinctly had a lower-cased title, and yet again I would love to discuss the symbolism and meaning behind that, but again, moving on), fear is a clearly defined theme that surges through the chapters of the story.
          The plot is, to say the least, co plicated. Ginny starts her senior year and its all fun until she meets the lurking, lonesome boy in her class. His name is Smitty Tibbs (sort of), and he is a genius. He has never spoken one word in his life. Ginny crosses lines that really, shouldn't have been crossed and ends up tip-toeing through the unknown.
          Ginny is afraid when she first sees Michael. Michael is terrified of his brother. Ginny is scared of what could happen to Michael. Caulder is sort of terrified of everything. I start to think about all the levels of fear, and if you can truly compare them because, with all honestly, everyone has their own fears for their own reasons. Some fear make sense to us like the dark or ghosts (both of which scare me). Others are, well... like I said, Everyone has their own reasons.
          But then there is the actually question of what is fear. I define fear as the unknown. Simple and plain. The dictionary definition: Fear is a distressing emotion aroused by a perceived threat. Close enough. They both deal with uncertainty.
          Ginny is uncertain about everything. College, school, life, her brothers, her friends. Then there is her math. Oh her math, the one thing that she could handle. She took her last problem to Michael because she knew he could show her how simple it was to fix. She knew he could settle at least some of the concerns she always had. She was quite selfish really.
          Everyone is able to deal with fear in their own way. They have techniques they use to trick them selves that its OK. They understand their fear.
          If you want to here something interesting, when I hear the word 'fear' I sort of picture a fluffy mass beside each person. This Fluffy mass varies from people, and is sort of like a pet. It stays close to you, but you are unaware of it until it jumps in your lap. I guess its hard to follow, but emotions can be like that sometimes.

Transformation Always Requires Huge Amounts of Effort - Mockingjay

          Now I am not going to pretend that I am writing about some book I haven't read, and write about prediction or whatever, because the truth is, I have read Mockingjay 30 times, along with the rest of The Hunger Games series. I would love to write about how the paragraphs are shaped and about what that means. However, I talked about writing structure in my last post. Moving on.

         Actually, there is one thing that bothers me: how intensely the characters change. I hadn't really come to terms with that. One of my favorite characters, Finnick, goes from to seductive, brave, and witty, to paranoid, frustrated, and unhinged. 

         Yet, I have to remind myself that the only Finnick that the readers know, is the one for the cameras. This is the first time we encounter him when his personality is not being spread around the country. Maybe Finnick is only able to pull himself together for small amounts of time. He puts all his energy into being calm for the camera. Maybe this unreasonable person, is the way he is. 

          As a matter of fact, my cousin works on a lot of movie sets, and she has quite a few "Oh that actress is crazy" stories, which I would never get from camera. There is this world, behind the camera where these people, these icons we see on television, and read about, are just that. People.

          We think we know what these people are like, and who they are. When I started this post, I was intending to talk about how people change so drastically because of trauma. I never considered that just because this was the way I had first seen the character, that it wasn't their true personality. Particularly due to that fact that these people are supposed to be perceived a certain way.

         As a matter of fact, I think the personality Finnick shows in the last book, makes a lot more sense then in the second book. Factor in all the slightly horrifying things he has been through, and his brave witty self, scares me more then his unhinged self. 

England Trends

          I'm reading The Dead Fathers Club, and I haven't gotten very far. However, I have noticed a trend going through my reading material. In this book, and the one I read before it, there hasn't been traditional punctuation. When people speak, There aren't "" marks. The dialog looks more like: She said Do you want to go home?
          It made me think about why both books did that. There are two similar things in each story: one, they are both set in England and two, the main characters are mentally challenged. Ruling out England just has bad grammar, I figured that there was a theme running through each book. The theme of reality.
          It is impossible to understand or know what is happening inside the heads of people who have autism, or some other disability. Both authors seem to agree that what happens to these children is very real. What I mean by that, is despite the lack of communication and understanding, they are still humans, and they still have emotions and feeling that all of us have.
         Portraying a mentally challenged person, is a very hard undertaking. You have to learn to be respectful, but to be truthful. We learned that in drama class. We don't even know how many people have autism. That is how much people scurry away from mental diseases.
          The lack of "" makes what your read, something you can almost hear in your own head. When you are having a conversation, you might not process what someone has said immediately, and sometimes you have to go back. That's the way this book works, sometimes I do have to reread to try and understand what has been said. This is even more amplified for the two main characters, because they are autistic. There is the lack of defining where someone speaks and where the rest of the world comes into play. That doesn't even make sense to me.

You Are No Hero

          There is, of course, Percy Jackson and the Lightning Thief. Then there is the movie adaptation. I have heard so much about how terrible the movie is compared to the book. I am not doubting this. However, there are different concepts behind each one.
          In the book, there is this overall theme of growing up. The kids start out young, and grow not only in age but awareness of the world. The book is more of a coming of age, and justice story. The movie is more about living in a modern world and how to adapt.
          I guess what both the movie and the book have in common is that there is the struggle and pull of old and new. Traditional and modern have this really dangerous balance and anything can tip that scale. The whole issue in the plot, is that some people want to destroy the old and start from scratch and some want to build on top of the old. 
         I guess what you have to try and figure out, is if the history and lessons of the past would help the future, or if the mistakes and damage would hold the future back. I personally think that the knowledge of the past is much more valuable. 
         We have to learn from our mistakes and gather information for the future. If you just wipe the slate clean, live to forget, what do you learn? Nothing. Each generation holds the power to continue, or eliminate. That is why I think the name of the book is Lightning Thief. Lightning stands for strength and power. This generation, this new age of heros, is stealing the power from the last.